Tag Archives: anxiety

6 days! (and no order to the thoughts in this post)

30 Sep

I leave for Spain in less than a week! I’m ridiculously excited, even if I am exhausted from this work project. You can always sleep when you’re dead, right?

Ever feel like you’re too prepared for a trip? I’ve been going through mental checklists the last few days: accommodations? passport? euros? clothing? backpack? blister kit? extra bandaids? both pairs of wool socks? I know I have everything ready, but my anxiety kicks in, so I just deal with it. Though, I do need to decide on what kind of waist wallet to wear. I could use a money pack to go around my neck, but the thought of walking with it like that already makes my neck react. It also doesn’t help that the weather is going to be a mix of partly cloudy and rain (that reminds me, need to buy a poncho now). It may come down to how I feel the night before I leave and just choose the waist wallet based on that night’s mood lol.

I still have people asking me why I’m doing this. Then, when they hear “pilgrimage”, they get *that* look on their face, and I shut down, because I’m not trying to get in a religious chat with anyone. I’m doing this for me. I need a spiritual retreat; a time for my soul to heal. It also doesn’t hurt that both the Camino AND Spain are on my bucket list, so 2-3 birds with one stone.

Spinning the wheels for a moment, as I was sitting at my altar at home a couple of nights ago, I did let my mind wander to how I’m really feeling towards the start of my Camino. Am I nervous? Of course. Nervous and anxious to about the 3rd level. Scared though? Nope. I’m excited, and can’t wait to have this adventure. Fear doesn’t control me, and I won’t live with any more regrets (still regret not doing one thing in Mexico, but c’est la vie). I kept my must-see list to a minimum this trip: the Camino, the “end of the world” in Fisterra, and then in Madrid, the National Archaeology Museum and the Temple of Debod. There is a lot more I would love to see in Spain, but that will have to wait until my next trip.

That’s it for this rambling mess of a post 🙂 I leave you with two quotes that speak volumes for/about me:

 

xox,
Jess

Work stress can’t dull my excitement!

10 Sep

It’s been awhile, I know. Life goes on, regardless of documenting every second of it. Synopsis? Stress. Anxiety. Nerves. Excitement.

I’ve started a new position at work and it’s basically required me to flip my schedule around. I’m back to the graveyard shift (which I tend to do better). I’m a bit stressed with it, but I’m also ready to get it going 110%.

The best part lately has been my growing excitement for my Camino! I’m anxious and nervous, but in the good “eek first time doing this” kind of way. I love it! Hostels/Hotels are as booked as I want them to be. The middle days are flexible depending on how far I walk those days. Overnight train ticket has been purchased. Clothing, footwear, backpack….all taken care of. I have been paranoid about my passport going missing, so I check on that daily lol. Sometimes you have to let the anxiety do its thing.

I’ll be sewing on my patches this weekend and spraying my backpack to help prevent bedbugs *knock on wood*. The boots need a few more walks in them for me to be confident that they are fully broken in. I know I need a few more odds and ends from Target and REI, but nothing that is detrimental to my trip if I don’t get it done prior to departure.

As far as my back-n-forth debate on taking my hiking poles with me….I’ve finally decided to NOT bring them, and to buy a set of poles at Decathlon in Ferrol. They’re a much lower price there, but, from what I’ve been told on various forums, the quality is quite good. If I have time in Madrid before catching the overnight train, I may scout out a Decathlon there. We shall see.

Ok, I’m yawning, so this post must come to a close. I hope everyone is doing well. I should have a few more blog posts before the journey begins, and *hopefully* a video or two up on YouTube. I’ll let y’all know 🙂

peace and love,
xox
jess

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